Why?

5/23

Yeah,
it got to me.

No matter how content I am with the situation...
it still hurts.

I mean I'm not gonna go off like I did
on my other blogger...but yeah.


ANYWAY!!

I went into work today,
even though I was off.
(:

(P)
IS SO SUPER AMAZING!!

hehe.


I didn't have to seem him.
Thank god.
Woulda been awkward on me.


//


When I think
right now...
I can say I don't like anyone.

But,
when I'm around one of the these
four guys.
I act different.
I know I'm acting different,
and I truly hate it.
So, why can't I act normal?
Is it lust?


Wow,
just read that lust is associated
with cows and the color blue.


You know what I miss?
And this has been on my mind since the asian
brought it up.
She asked,
"Why do you wanna get in a relationship so fast?"
I said,
"Fast? It's been 2 months..."
She said,
"Well not fast, so bad?"
Then I shut up.


Later that day,
my friend and I got into this talk.
Venting but not?
We do this weird thing.
He asked if I knew what Love was.
I told him, no...I don't believe in it.
He kinda agreed.
I told him he should go back out and date.
He said no.
I asked why?
He said, I'm tired of getting hurt.

I laughed at little at myself.

Then told him,
you have to learn to get up from those falls.

He asks,
"How do you do it?"

I said,
"I think about how I felt when I was with that last person.
That I wanna feel that feeling all the time,
and I wont feel that, doing nothing."

"What do you miss?"


So,
I listed things I missed.
Then told him,
"If I found a relationship,
as good or even better then that,
I wouldn't have to miss it anymore,
and yeah maybe I might get hurt,
but I'll just wanna find that feeling all over again.
It keeps me busy with life."

Then our conversation ended.
I got sleepy.


//


So,
working on a story.
It's not to great.
):

But it's better then nothing.

It's kinda like
my person thought of what people
REALLY think of me.

hmmm.


(Dbb)
Why do I like you?
UGH!!!
):

(RS)
I don't think I like you anymore.
(:
So, we really can
be just friends.

(EJ)
I think I'm getting over you.
You make me mad sometimes.
So, idk.

(PITB)
I don't even know where
to start with you.
I like you,
I don't like you,
I like you,
and guess what?
I don't.

So the four is now down to two.


Mwah.

O-ECS